for my husband to come home. For 'good' would be nice, but I'll take the two weeks he gets coming up in the latter part of January. All the little things (including the little people) are starting to add up and wear me down. Weary would be the word that best describes my attitude right now... Not quite to the point of not caring, or that I'm going to lock my children in a closet just yet, but to the point where I'm going to scream if I can't even sit down for a cup of coffee without the powdered sugar being dumped all over the kitchen. I know the powdered sugar shouldn't be within reach, but we had just finished breakfast and I wanted coffee before cleaning up! Weary of being sick and tired too and wondering when my energy levels will come up or if this is going to be it for the rest of my life. Weary of worrying about it. Weary of having one 'productive' day out of three. And you're probably weary of the whining already! I am ready for the big kids to go back to school tomorrow and I am ready for J to be here just to give me a break and a few days of sleeping in to recharge for the next four months.
I originally sat down to write about resolutions but you got whining instead and then I got to thinking that I don't feel a whole lot of resolve right now to do anything which brought me to how much I really need my husband home for a little bit... So after I make it through the next couple of weeks, I'll look back on this to remind myself of my goals for the New Year.
The main thing is health:
1. Spiritually, I'm feeling the void from not attending church regularly and my prayer life could use a boost.
2. Physically, hoping the cancer thing is under control but won't know until March, but taking the steps I need to with diet and exercise to help that along. Feeding my children better food.
3. Financially, doing a better job on sticking to our budget and cutting out the 'impulse' buys.
I'm sure there are a lot more things I could be resolving to do, but I'll be happy to get one out the three listed accomplished...
Sunday, January 4, 2009
I am so ready...
Posted by M at 2:09 PM
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4 comments:
I am completely with you on the kid problems. I just feel like I'm right on the brink of insanity. I'm tired of breaking up fights, repeating basic instructions and cleaning up messes that "I didn't do"!!! Needless to say, I cannot WAIT until school starts tomorrow. God bless those teachers!
You know, I sometime read your blog and think. Meagan is so great. She just seems to roll with it and does it with a sence of humor. I can only imagine how hard it is with four and dealing with health issues. I hope it gets better and you get your break. I just wanted to let you know that looking in from the outside...I think you are a great mom and seem to be doing a great job of keeping it moving...even as "weary" as you are. Hang in there!
I often think of "how does she do it?", and am thankful God has carried you through all He has. Through trials we are refined by God, although the process isn't ever very fun. Your family is in our prayers all the time, and we are also waiting for John to come home to give you the hugs and love and support you need (and he needs too). Keep on keeping on and a prayer I often say is "God, please help me do whatever it is I'm supposed to be doing" and He does.
Thanks for the encouragement ladies! Better week after my complaining...
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